Phoenix Children's Hospital

The kids arrived home from school. I allowed James to have a snack, and to use the bathroom, and then headed him into the van. He was already in a "mood," and there was no way I could tell him where we were going. I broke the news gently to him as we drove to meet Erik at work, "We're going to a place where the doctors can watch you, and help you to get your meds. right." He was okay with that. _____________________________ It was dinnertime, so we got him something to eat at Burger King. We just didn't think to get anything for ourselves. ____________________________ We did a lot of waiting. Waiting in the waiting room. Waiting in the 3 different rooms that we were sent to. Waiting. It was actually rather pleasant with James. He was fairly relaxed, and content to be there. ____________________________ Somewhere between 10:30 and 11:00, we were allowed to go on up to the inpatient center, where they gave us a quick tour, then escorted James off to bed, while they explained the program to us, and we signed a bunch of papers. I thought it would be heart wrenching to walk away, but it wasn't. James was content to say good-bye, and by that point I was so tired that I was ready to go home. __________________________ 12:20 a.m. Arrived home from the hospital, ate pizza for dinner, went to bed & tried to sleep. Restless thinking of James, and wondering how he felt sleeping in a strange bed.

8 a.m. - 3 p.m. Phone calls upon phone calls. Had at least 5 calls from different staff members at the hospital. James went to bed fine, woke before it was time to get up, had a bm during the night, ate a good breakfast (1/2 his French toast, all of his cereal & juice).

6 - 7 p.m. Visited with James. He heard our voices as we came in, and he came running straight to me, and gave me a tight hug. We played with the Legos, built a marble drop, and got creative with the Mr. Potato Heads and Family. James wouldn't tell me much about his day, and was very guarded in his emotions, rarely looking me in the eye. He lied to me about playing the computer all day, and about being wet, but corrected himself when I called him on it. He got irritated with me when I asked him to stop playing, and to put away his clothes. The irritation was short lived, and then he complied. He was so proud of the way he made his bed this morning, but he wouldn't discuss with me what the smiley faces on his calendar meant. We drew on the whiteboard in his room, and he smiled when I wrote I LOVE JAMES in block letters. We erased the board, but my words were still etched there. He was touched that Joseph wrote him a letter, and drew him pictures. He returned to that several times, to read "I love you, James!!!!!!!!" over and over again, and he studied the picture of our family that we brought for him. When it was almost time for us to leave, he asked if he could come with us. I told him that he could come home when the doctor said that it was okay. He threw down what he was holding, with frustration. When it was time for us to go, he asked me when the doctor was going to tell him that it was time to go. Holding my hand, he approached the head nurse and asked her if he could come home with us. She told him, "Not yet." He gave Erik and I good hugs good-bye, and this time it was harder to walk away from him. I cried on the way home, as I thought of his sweet, little face, and his wish to come home with us.